Monday, November 22, 2004

Battle of the Bands

The military is using AC/DC and Metallica to combat the terrorists in Iraq. This just goes to show how even Rolling Stone can underestimate the greatness and "impact" of these bands and their music.

As tanks geared up to trample Fallujah and American troops started circling the city, special operations officers rifled through their CD cases, searching for a sound track to spur the assault.

What would irk Iraqi insurgents more: Barking dogs or bluegrass? Screaming babies or shrieking feedback?

Heavy metal. The Army's latest weapon.


While the tanks flattened Fallujah this month, Hell's Bells bombarded the town. Speakers as big as footlockers blared from Humvees' gun turrets. Boom boxes blasted off soldiers' backpacks. As the troops stormed closer, the music got louder. The song changed; the message remained the same.

For a 19-year-old Marine who has been coiled in a tent for weeks, ready to strike, Metallica's Enter Sandman might be more inspiring than any officer's pep talk.

Dreams of war, dreams of liars

Dreams of dragon's fire

and of things that will bite

Sleep with one eye open

Gripping your pillow tight . . .

"Our soldiers like this music," Kuehl said. "So that's what they're going to blast."

The army also played some Barney the purple dinosaur and the theme from Sesame Street. Now that's torture. Naturally, Amnesty International thinks that "such tactics may constitute torture." I'm going to be tortured by Metallica on Sunday at the HP Pavillon in San Jose. I can't wait. Call me an red insurgent in a blue state.